I am leaving shortly for Jennifer's funeral. What do you say to people in a time of such tragedy?
The best thing is to offer your presence. Mourning practice within the Jewish tradition teaches that when visiting a House of Mourning one must not greet the mourner until they greet you.
This allows the mourner to determine what type of interaction they desire. Unless they greet you and start to talk to you, your presence is all that is required.
Still, tomorrow I will speak at the funeral. This role transcends that of presence. Eulogies--whether informal or formal--allow the gathered family and friends to get a sense of who the person is and help celebrate the deceased's life. It is always easier to do this when someone dies after a full-life. I will offer rememberances of Jennifer from parents and I and use Jewish texts as a frame .